Untitled by David Tierney

The sound of coughs and groans was the signal the demons had been waiting for. Their eerie shrieks struck such a fear in Kevins heart that he had no choice but to leave his precious treasure of white gold behind. He ran towards the forest where the fairies could protect him with their enchanting melodies. They played soft notes on mystical harps and flutes driving away the monsters with their beauty.             Kevin was about to thank the fairies but they vanished literally into the trees. The marching of minute feat followed the beating of an army drum which in turn was followed by beating of Kevins heart. Red eyes glowed in the distance. It could only be one thing he knew. Leprecons. They wanted their gold back but Kevin had left it behind. He ran far from the trees where the beasts would not follow.            Alas, to his misfortune a banshee appeared. She too wanted the mystical white gold. She chased him screaming ancient english songs of Bob the Builder giving his ears endless agony. His fleeing proved futile as he reached a cliff. He was now trapped. The ultimate karaoke singer had him cornered and her wails only attracted more of her kind.            To his horror thousands of fiends came. Witches chanted curses as devils danced. Then, worst of all, the banshees began to sing Westlife songs.            NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOooooo…” he screamed not being able to take it any longer.He prayed to almighty god to end his insanity. His prayers were answered by heavenly angels. They floated down singing spells made by great wizards and sorceresses such as Evanescence and

Linkin
Park. They magically conjured him wings and he flew off the cliff to safety. There’s a moral to this story, don’t do drugs. Ten thousand feet later, Squish.